It is how I came to find loneliness
\nthat intrigued me.
\nThe smell of an old kitchen,
\nwood under my bare feet,
\nan enfant lost in yeast and mold,
\nand green paint above the window.
\nThe room held a vast loneliness,
\nand I was left alone for the first time,
\nseparated from the place I lived in.
\nAnd this returned
\nwhen I entered any strangeness.
\nWhen I was bound to a duty,
\na place that became a box,
\na cover that took away my breath,
\na door that blinded the light.<\/p>\n
It was not the loneliness of love,
\nbut of knives,
\nof falling from a limb,
\nof stammering
\nand seeing no light house,
\nno wave that came to me
\nabove the others,
\nno time that held dreams together,
\nemptiness that had no bottom or top.
\nA psychological dilemma,
\nan instinctive fear of fire,
\nwords that stumble on each other.
\nA life where entrances and exits
\ndon\u2019t matter,
\nand friendships hold no ache or pain.
\nIf I were Diogenes
\nI would have given up
\nthe search for an honest man
\nand sought the substance
\nthat fills the heart,
\nthat never leaves us
\nwithout a candle to see by.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
It is how I came to find loneliness that intrigued me. The smell of an old kitchen, wood under my bare feet, an enfant lost…<\/p>\n